His phone stayed silent through the evening, through Sophie waking up for water and reassurance. Through the long night of lying awake, replaying every moment of the past three days, seeing his mistakes crystallize into sharp relief. By morning, Sophie’s fever was completely gone, and she was demanding pancakes with her usual energy.

“Ethan made breakfast mechanically, checking his phone every 30 seconds for a message that didn’t come.” “Is Mara coming over today?” Sophie asked around a mouthful of pancake. “I don’t think so, sweetheart. Why not? Did I make her mad when I said I missed you? No, baby. You didn’t do anything wrong. Then why isn’t she here? Because I broke something, Ethan thought.

Because I got scared and protective and I treated her like she was temporary when she’s been proving she’s permanent for 6 months. I need to talk to her, he said finally, to apologize for something I did wrong. Sophie considered this seriously. You should bring her flowers. On TV, when grown-ups mess up, they bring flowers. Flowers might not be enough this time.

Then what do you bring? Ethan looked at his daughter at her dark curls and serious expression and complete faith that problems could be solved if you just tried hard enough. Honesty and a promise to do better. That sounds harder than flowers. It is much harder. That afternoon, after confirming Sophie was fully recovered and leaving her with Marcus and Clare, Ethan drove to Mara’s apartment.

He’d only been here a handful of times. She always came to them, always existed in their space, rather than requiring they share hers. “The building was modern and expensive, all glass and steel and doormen who looked at him suspiciously when he asked to be buzzed up.” “Is Miss Lewis expecting you?” the doorman asked. “No, but please tell her Ethan’s here. It’s important.

” The doorman spoke quietly into his phone, then handed it to Ethan. Mar’s voice came through tight and controlled. I said I needed space. I know, but I can’t leave things like this. Please, just 5 minutes. A long pause. Fine. Come up. Her apartment was exactly what he expected. minimalist furniture, expensive art, floor to ceiling windows with views of the city, everything perfectly arranged and carefully controlled, just like Mara herself.

She stood by the window when he entered, her arms crossed, her expression guarded. 5 minutes, she said. I’m sorry for coming home early, for making you feel like you couldn’t handle Sophie. For treating you like a substitute instead of a parent. You are her parent. I’m just You’re her parent, too.

You’ve been parenting her for 6 months. You know her routines, her fears, her favorite books, and least favorite foods. You comfort her when she’s scared and celebrate with her when she’s proud. You’re not a substitute. You’re essential. Mara’s jaw tightened. Then why did you rush home the second she got sick? Why did you assume I couldn’t handle it? Because I’m terrified.

Because Sophie’s all I have left of Sarah. And if something happened to her on someone else’s watch, I’d never forgive myself. Because I’ve been the only one responsible for her for 3 years. And I don’t know how to stop being hypervigilant. That’s not about me being inadequate. That’s about you not trusting anyone. You’re right. It is. Ethan moved closer.

And I need to work on that. I need to trust that you love her as much as I do. That you’ll keep her safe. that you’re not going to disappear the second things get hard. But you don’t trust that. When it came down to it, you ran home like I was failing her. I was wrong. Sophie was fine. You were handling it perfectly.

I panicked because I’m not used to sharing this responsibility. And I hurt you because I’m still learning how to let someone else matter this much. Mara turned away, looking out the window at the city stretching below. I can’t keep being second choice, Ethan. I can’t keep wondering if you’ll ever really commit to this or if you’re just keeping me around until something better comes along. There is nothing better.

There’s just you. Complicated and honest and perfect for us in ways I didn’t know we needed. Then prove it. She turned back to face him, her green eyes bright with unshed tears. Stop treating me like a friend helping out. Stop introducing me as Sophie’s mom’s friend or your friend Mara. If I’m part of this family, actually make me part of it.

Claim me publicly, permanently. I will. It when after another 6 months of proving myself, after a year, after Sophie graduates high school, her voice cracked. I’ve given you everything I have. I’ve rearranged my life around yours. I’ve loved your daughter like she’s my own, and I’m still just the woman you’re seeing.

Just Mara, never more than that. The accusation hit like a physical blow because it was true. He’d been holding back, keeping language vague, maintaining emotional distance even as their lives intertwined completely. “You’re right,” he said quietly. “I’ve been afraid to commit completely because committing means risking loss again, and I can’t survive losing someone else I love.

So, you’d rather lose me slowly by never fully having me? I’d rather keep you at a distance I think I can survive.” He moved closer. close enough to see the tears tracking down her cheeks. But that’s cowardice, and it’s not fair to you. You deserve someone who claims you without hesitation, who introduces you as family without qualifications, who trusts you completely instead of testing you constantly.

I deserve someone who chooses me, Mara said, her voice breaking completely now. Not someone who keeps me around because I’m convenient or because I’m good with his kid. someone who actually wants me. All of me forever. I do want you. I’m just scared. I know you’ve said that. But Ethan, I’m scared, too. I’m terrified of screwing this up.

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